The Exact Moment

Do we always know the exact moment change happens in our lives? Do we know the exact moment we turn from a boy into a man, or a girl into a woman? Do we know the exact moment someone in our lives changes from an acquaintance to a friend? Do we know the exact moment we decide upon a career? Do we know the exact moment we fall in love?

Sometimes, the answer is yes. Most often, it is no. I do remember the exact moment I physically changed from a girl to a woman, but according to society's standards, I don't know the exact moment I changed from a girl to a woman. I don't know the exact moment my best friend became my best friend. I don't know the exact moment I decided to take the career path I chose. I don't know. . .

And I don't know the exact moment my heart and mind started to go under a life-altering change. I do know it has been within the last three months, but the exact moment. . . ? I could spend hours upon hours searching my memories for the exact moment this change began occurring, but it wouldn't help. Quite frankly, it doesn't matter when this exact moment took place. The important thing is that this change is happening, and I don't know if I can stop it or change it back. It is huge, it is life-altering, it is utterly frightening, and I don't know who to tell. . .

[And no, I am not a lesbian. . .]